Go camping for 1 night and go screen-free. Or just go somewhere without TV/smartphone/internet/smartwatch (you have to really disconnect)
You'll magically find that your brain works just like you remember within a very short period of hours.
Sadly, even knowing the detriment to my life, it is still extremely hard for me to stay away from smartphones and note others seem to have the same issue.
Not particularly. On the other hand, I'm retired, my days are in many ways much alike, and "what did you do last Thursday" could leave me mumbling. On the other hand, I've met about a dozen people in the last three weeks, and remember their names. (I did write them down.)
Mine did. I can't remember telling the same stories multiple times. I even laughed at my own joke after it was told to me, not realising it came from me. If someone asks me what I've done yesterday or last weekend, I blank out completely. I struggle with journaling because I don't easily recall how my day was.
I can't tell if it's new. My mother is the same, and I don't remember ever having an especially good memory. Maybe it just get pointed out more?
At least my behaviour is consistent. What I'm told I've said always checks out. I am also obsessively organised, so things rarely slip through. I would be a terrible liar though.
Mine has been patchy for a long time, but I've come up with various rationalisations:
- Work item priorities changing on a semi-regular basis means that "working memory" can need to be purged at the drop of a hat. Happens enough times and you just start, not even necessarily consciously, not committing some things to memory.
- Having kids has meant there's always something on "soon", so we try to keep all the things in a shared calendar. It's not possible for me to remember all the things, so there's no point remembering some of them, so I don't. The calendar is the singular source of truth.
- My wife tends to recount the entirety of her day to me, randomly interspersed with a couple of pieces of information that are critically important to our lives between now and three months from now, as soon as either she or I walk in the door after work. I don't try to remember any of it any more because I just don't, and never did, have the throughput capability.
- I've heard that making memories (and this might be specific to long term behavioural type memories, so maybe moot) has a relationship with adrenaline production - you'll remember something scary or exciting or dangerous or unusual. I'm a fairly chill mf, so my assumption is that I don't pump adrenaline quite a easily as most people, and therefore memories are less likely to be "sticky" (tenuous reasoning).
- Life and work are increasingly busy and complex. Short term memory may be getting saturated by things we don't realise are using short term memory, and so it feels as if short term memory is worse, when actually it's just at capacity all the time.
- There is always something else on our minds. If you're thinking about X (which is important to you) and someone else starts explaining Y, then there's a fair period of mental wind down of X in order to start processing Y, during which time they've already kinda got to the middle.
An analogy I've used when discussing "remembering details" with work colleagues:
We're having 50 tennis balls thrown at us all at once. We shouldn't be expected to be catching more than one - and it may not even be the one you were trying to catch.
In the case of my wife's rapid fire information delivery, I'm being thrown 50 tennis balls, two of which are invisibly marked as critical, and I'm expected to catch both.
Do you drink alcohol? I took a pause and found my memory was better, I suspect people get into a cycle of drinking, being kind of "bleh" then starting the cycle over and don't realize it because they're not like... hung over. They're not alcoholics. But even small amounts of alcohol fuck with you REM sleep.
I have always had some mindless habits, like putting something down without thinking, and then having to wonder where it is. I just never filed it.
Now that I am old as in 76, I find that things which should be instantly retrievable from memory have a 5 second or so lag, and then they are right there. If I try to search the web for a hint (this sometimes triggers recall) but with the current sad state of search, I have to scroll past pages of “this shit’s for sale” if not downright ads instead of something I seek. That just angers me. I find that I can remember things faster than the internet of sh—t. It seems to have (you guessed it, ADHD).
When I discussed some of my macro behaviors with my daughter, the psych grad, such as putting off a move decision (because things are stable here though with serous distance and loneliness limitations, compared to the risk and effort of moving) and some other things (that I forgot … ) she said that was textbook ADHD, though on a large scale rather than moment to moment. I’ll look this up.
A boring day today, then a double rainbow appeared along with a fine sunset (those fluffy clouds make one) each on the other side of the ridge here, so hiking was involved, and then took a shot at some Rachmaninoff, so I can’t say anything’s duller upstairs.
Most of us are infovores, and can’t possibly thoroughly read every article we see. I file stuff as PDF’s for computer search (you know what I think of web search) and later reading. I am OK with this because I don’t actually NEED the vast majority of it, and some gets filed on the desktop because it’s the outlier that really wants me to act on it. It’s the gold in the pan.
Scanning through the mass of photos or reading those hundreds (thousands) of musical notes on the page (iPad) really does take attention, and I take breaks. I think I underestimate what goes into touching up photos, and reading so many notes that always seem too small.
The only really annoying thing is the delay in recall, but I am expecting instant recall, and that’s a lot for anyone. The summer heat kept me inside too much, and that means staring at screens. Cooler now, so I’ll get outside more, and don’t forget sunshine for vitamin D.
And short term? I am slowly downsizing, and there’s just too much lying around to keep track of. The few moments when things are better organized, things are easier to find. And guess who’s posting on Hacker News instead of straightening up the kitchen? Well, that must be attended to.
my mom is in a nursing home, ended up there after dad fell and got hurt, and her memory was shot, and the rest of her cognitive performance was going to hell, and through whatever combination of factors, PLUS getting the shingles vacine she has made a very very significant recovery, my dad got the same vacine, and has also had a significant cognitive improvement, which has translated into physical improvements, as he was stuck in bed after breaking his 11'th vertebra after the fall, prognosis was "death" and he is able to struggle to his feet and is getting stronger, he's 97, mom's 82, were both hospitalised during covid.
point bieng: if they can bounce back, whats your fucking excuse?
Go camping for 1 night and go screen-free. Or just go somewhere without TV/smartphone/internet/smartwatch (you have to really disconnect)
You'll magically find that your brain works just like you remember within a very short period of hours.
Sadly, even knowing the detriment to my life, it is still extremely hard for me to stay away from smartphones and note others seem to have the same issue.
Not particularly. On the other hand, I'm retired, my days are in many ways much alike, and "what did you do last Thursday" could leave me mumbling. On the other hand, I've met about a dozen people in the last three weeks, and remember their names. (I did write them down.)
Mine did. I can't remember telling the same stories multiple times. I even laughed at my own joke after it was told to me, not realising it came from me. If someone asks me what I've done yesterday or last weekend, I blank out completely. I struggle with journaling because I don't easily recall how my day was.
I can't tell if it's new. My mother is the same, and I don't remember ever having an especially good memory. Maybe it just get pointed out more?
At least my behaviour is consistent. What I'm told I've said always checks out. I am also obsessively organised, so things rarely slip through. I would be a terrible liar though.
Try going for a long run(10km) or a walk(2h). NO HEADPHONES!
Mine has been patchy for a long time, but I've come up with various rationalisations:
- Work item priorities changing on a semi-regular basis means that "working memory" can need to be purged at the drop of a hat. Happens enough times and you just start, not even necessarily consciously, not committing some things to memory.
- Having kids has meant there's always something on "soon", so we try to keep all the things in a shared calendar. It's not possible for me to remember all the things, so there's no point remembering some of them, so I don't. The calendar is the singular source of truth.
- My wife tends to recount the entirety of her day to me, randomly interspersed with a couple of pieces of information that are critically important to our lives between now and three months from now, as soon as either she or I walk in the door after work. I don't try to remember any of it any more because I just don't, and never did, have the throughput capability.
- I've heard that making memories (and this might be specific to long term behavioural type memories, so maybe moot) has a relationship with adrenaline production - you'll remember something scary or exciting or dangerous or unusual. I'm a fairly chill mf, so my assumption is that I don't pump adrenaline quite a easily as most people, and therefore memories are less likely to be "sticky" (tenuous reasoning).
- Life and work are increasingly busy and complex. Short term memory may be getting saturated by things we don't realise are using short term memory, and so it feels as if short term memory is worse, when actually it's just at capacity all the time.
- There is always something else on our minds. If you're thinking about X (which is important to you) and someone else starts explaining Y, then there's a fair period of mental wind down of X in order to start processing Y, during which time they've already kinda got to the middle.
An analogy I've used when discussing "remembering details" with work colleagues:
We're having 50 tennis balls thrown at us all at once. We shouldn't be expected to be catching more than one - and it may not even be the one you were trying to catch.
In the case of my wife's rapid fire information delivery, I'm being thrown 50 tennis balls, two of which are invisibly marked as critical, and I'm expected to catch both.
(This is only slightly hyperbolic)
Do you drink alcohol? I took a pause and found my memory was better, I suspect people get into a cycle of drinking, being kind of "bleh" then starting the cycle over and don't realize it because they're not like... hung over. They're not alcoholics. But even small amounts of alcohol fuck with you REM sleep.
https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=45379292 :
https://medicalxpress.com/news/2025-09-sharp-memory-problems...
long covid really hits your memory faculties hard.
the only things that help: deep-breathing exercises, dexketoprofen, creatine, staying warm, and years of time for recovery.
I have always had some mindless habits, like putting something down without thinking, and then having to wonder where it is. I just never filed it.
Now that I am old as in 76, I find that things which should be instantly retrievable from memory have a 5 second or so lag, and then they are right there. If I try to search the web for a hint (this sometimes triggers recall) but with the current sad state of search, I have to scroll past pages of “this shit’s for sale” if not downright ads instead of something I seek. That just angers me. I find that I can remember things faster than the internet of sh—t. It seems to have (you guessed it, ADHD).
When I discussed some of my macro behaviors with my daughter, the psych grad, such as putting off a move decision (because things are stable here though with serous distance and loneliness limitations, compared to the risk and effort of moving) and some other things (that I forgot … ) she said that was textbook ADHD, though on a large scale rather than moment to moment. I’ll look this up.
A boring day today, then a double rainbow appeared along with a fine sunset (those fluffy clouds make one) each on the other side of the ridge here, so hiking was involved, and then took a shot at some Rachmaninoff, so I can’t say anything’s duller upstairs.
Most of us are infovores, and can’t possibly thoroughly read every article we see. I file stuff as PDF’s for computer search (you know what I think of web search) and later reading. I am OK with this because I don’t actually NEED the vast majority of it, and some gets filed on the desktop because it’s the outlier that really wants me to act on it. It’s the gold in the pan.
Scanning through the mass of photos or reading those hundreds (thousands) of musical notes on the page (iPad) really does take attention, and I take breaks. I think I underestimate what goes into touching up photos, and reading so many notes that always seem too small.
The only really annoying thing is the delay in recall, but I am expecting instant recall, and that’s a lot for anyone. The summer heat kept me inside too much, and that means staring at screens. Cooler now, so I’ll get outside more, and don’t forget sunshine for vitamin D.
And short term? I am slowly downsizing, and there’s just too much lying around to keep track of. The few moments when things are better organized, things are easier to find. And guess who’s posting on Hacker News instead of straightening up the kitchen? Well, that must be attended to.
Good luck.
I will give a basic advice: go see a professional!
my mom is in a nursing home, ended up there after dad fell and got hurt, and her memory was shot, and the rest of her cognitive performance was going to hell, and through whatever combination of factors, PLUS getting the shingles vacine she has made a very very significant recovery, my dad got the same vacine, and has also had a significant cognitive improvement, which has translated into physical improvements, as he was stuck in bed after breaking his 11'th vertebra after the fall, prognosis was "death" and he is able to struggle to his feet and is getting stronger, he's 97, mom's 82, were both hospitalised during covid. point bieng: if they can bounce back, whats your fucking excuse?
get.off.your.fucking.ass.