5th grade, my best friend at the time was in a basketball team, just a small town league for kids. I never really played basketball, so I was planning to watch the game then we'd hang out. It was the first game of the season and my friend was getting his uniform from a table when a dad running things asked me what team I was playing on and I said no, I'm just here to hang out with my friend.
He shook his head and said, "No, that won't do. You're on his team, too" and handed me a jersey. Then he went ahead and paid my registration fee.
More than the money, it was the proactive nature of it that struck me at the time. The thing is, if I had asked my parents they probably would have signed me up. But it was one of those things where it would have never crossed my mind to ask. I ws as one of those kids that needed a push every now and then and rarely got one.
I never got very good at basketball but I never missed a game and had a great time with my friend. So not a tragic or desperate story, but still meaningful to me all these years later.
Eating at nice restaurant with my entire family. When we finished the meal the waiter came out with a dessert and said that someone across the restaurant paid for our entire meal. I was shocked, I looked around and I think I might know who it was, but they were already gone. That was probably a $150-$200 dollar check. I'm still shocked to this day.
I live in Minnesota and do not own a snowblower. Probably my mistake, but I always joke that I get most of my exercise in the winter. Snow is really heavy for those without context.
A couple years ago we had a particularly bad snowfall. The plow has a nasty hate filled habit of dumping all its snow in my driveway. I had a drift at the end of my driveway about 4 feet high and 6 feet deep. Literally up to my chest. I had spent a solid hour just chipping away at it trying to get my car out and had made very little progress.
Right as I was about to give up in frustration, a man in a bobcat drove by. Moments later he turned around, came back, and asked "would you like me to clear that for you?" I told him that would be amazing. Took him a couple minutes and then he waved and drove off before I got a chance to offer him any money or even thank him.
I think about this guy pretty often, it's absolutely the random act of kindness in my life I have appreciated most.
My best friend, his girlfriend, brother, sister and I piled into a minivan in July of 2018 and drove from Boston to SF. Best friend and I both took jobs there out of school and decided to make a trip of the life move.
We painted BOS > SF on the back window. At a gas station in Memphis a random guy walked up to us and said "Make sure you go to Graceland. Can't miss it."
We sort of smile and nod politely and then walk into the gas station to use the bathroom, reload on snacks etc.
10 mins later we come back outside and the same guy comes over "I bought you all tickets to Graceland, who can I text them to?"
Truly such a sick moment. Graceland was a highlight of the trip and to have someone just do such a random kind thing made it that much better. Long live Elvis, long live the King. Thanks again to whoever you are that did that. Respect.
I saw my mom do something as a child that really stuck with me. This was back in the 70s cause I’m old. It was summer in the Midwest we were in the car in a store parking lot gettin ready to leave. An African-American lady pulled into a spot beside our car. In front of her was a pickup truck with two men and a pregnant woman. They started accosting the lady telling her she had bumped their vehicle and now the pregnant woman was in pain. This was the 70s so everyone’s windows were down so we heard the whole thing. The gist was these people were clearly trying to extort money from this lady. My mom got out and dressed them down because she had been watching and the ladies car didn’t touch their truck. They sulked and drove away. The lady was very afraid and very grateful. This was a time and place where not a lot of African Americans lived. That really stuck with me over the years.
3-day bike trip, NYC to Provincetown. On day two, our group split up and I was riding with a close friend. 15 miles into the 100-mile day, we got our 3rd flat. We had only carried 2 spare tubes.
We had barely pulled our bikes onto the sidewalk when a woman in a sedan slowed down to ask if we needed help. We said yes and she quickly pulled over. We piled our bikes into her car, trunk open, and she drove us to the nearest bike shop.
Turns out her family member ran the shop.
Truly saved our day. We made it to Provincetown and 15 years later still remember her so fondly and are so thankful!
I missed last train due to delays and there was a group of in the same situation. One nice person offered me to that I can sleep on their couch. And they were so nice to give me a ride to the station the next day.
I was so angry at first when I found out that this was my last train and I missed it but it turned out to be great story I can tell :)
Thank you strangers, I'll repay it back to somebody in the future
My chain had slipped off the rear sprocket, wedged itself between the gear and the frame. I forgot my toolkit and I was unable to free it. I was miles out of town so a walk back was going to take hours. A guy on a motorcycle rode by, looked at me and turned around. He got off his bike, got his tools, and freed the chain in seconds. I was profoundly grateful. Years later, I happened across a cyclist in a similar situation. I helped him and I told him I was simply paying back the first guy who had helped me. It felt really good.
Stopped in the dark on a December night on the shoulder of an interstate junction to change a tire after I had a blowout while driving. Under normal circumstances, I probably could have handled it myself, but I was getting about four hours of sleep a night because of tinnitus.
I was very nervous when a random guy stopped. My initial thought was, "Am I about to be robbed?" But it turned out that he was just a local aerospace engineer, and it was his hobby to help stranded motorists.
We had driven to a small remote village on Vancouver Island BC, to catch an early morning ferry. We had reserved a room at the only motel in town. We got there around 9PM. The a*h** owner ignored the doorbell and did not let us in (we could see him moving around in his attached residence). We went to a restaurant that was just about closing, told our story, and asked the owners if there were any options. Their friend, who was hanging around there overheard us .. he invited us to come over to his house and spend the night. The next day he insisted on buying us a wonderful breakfast.
When we got back home after the long trip, we sent him a nice sweatshirt with "New Jersey" on it.
I love going out of my way to help people, but hate when people help me or give me gifts. I don’t know how to experience “pure” gratitude that isn’t overwhelmed by guilt.
Didn't expel me from university for an insensitive prank I accidentally sent to the administration instead of my friends. I discovered the university's email server was unsecured and thought it would be funny to send fake emergency alerts to my friends from the official university email. I mixed up the "from" and "to" fields though... oops.
Not a stranger but strangers
I was returning home from an event early evening. Being absorbed in my thoughts. I got both my front tires free spinning without traction in a ditch.
Although this was in Nigeria, we have this certain camaraderie through hardship, it was still extremely surprising seeing a group of 6 men come out of nowhere, having nothing to do with each other aside being passerbys join hands, exerting sweaty effort to get my car out a ditch by 8pm.
I high-centered my car on a drift coming out of the Taco Bell drive thru - not a minute passed before ten or so people appeared out of nowhere and pushed me over and out.
Literally, the moment before there hadn’t been anything around but me and that Taco Bell.
I like this. I hope this thread fills with many more comments.
I think it's important to remember especially in traffic and such that cars aren't cars, they are people. I have no idea the real ratios, but imagine 20% are genuinely good people, 60% are just going about their lives, and 20% are miserable for some reason and drive like miserable people. It's easy to think everyone else is an idiot and become aggressive, but remember it's a small percentage who actually agitate you.
Now to answer the question. I guess it's when I was a kid, I'd completely torn my ACL but they wouldn't operate until I was done growing. I don't know how old, 12 maybe? I was in Washington DC running across a busy street when my knee slid out of place and I fell in the road. A Mercedes stopped, purposely blocking both lanes of traffic, and a husky middle aged black lady in scrubs got out and dragged me out of the road onto the sidewalk. She asked if I was ok, and I was as it happened here and there, and off she went. It was such a kind gesture in a city that seemed so cold and always on the go.
I was at an antique shop in Alameda about to buy a pulp sci-fi book. It was just a couple of bucks, nothing expensive. But the card reader wasn't accepting my Apple Pay. Another guy shopping there offered to pay for me. I told him I could Venmo or PayPal him the money, but he wouldn't take it. It wasn't a big deal in terms of money, but he didn't have to do that
Some years ago, I left my wallet at home and had filled my car with petrol at the petrol station, and the lady behind me paid for it and refused to give me her details so I could return the money.
I had finished my hamburger, zoning out. I had my guitar with me, having had a belowpar band practice, while waiting for my therapist appointment. Life was heading downwards in a slow, but steady, fashion.
This wonderful woman came over and asked if I wanted a hug. It warmed me to my bones. She said that "people should do that more", or something along those lines, and disappeared.
I don't remember her face, I just remember the warm feeling in my chest.
It was snowing. I scraped the windshield of my car. When I was done, I turned the key - and the battery was dead. I shrugged, gathered my belongings and was about to go back into my apartment building. But a woman who has just arrived in her car came up to me. And she asked, “Is your car not starting? You can use mine if you like.” I had needed seen here before. I took it. I returned it with a full tank in the evening. I’ve since had two other random strangers lend me their car, both in Germany and in the US. It’s something I wouldn’t have believed people would do. And it’s something I wouldn’t have accepted out of fear. But I had learned: Being kind and accepting kindness are two sides of the same coin. The one cannot exists without the other.
I wouldn't be comfortable borrowing someone's car, especially in the snow. If I were GP, I'd have driven it up next to my car, used the battery to jump mine, and thanked the stranger.
Me, Austrian and two Austrian friends were doing a road trip through western Canada. We had a rental car with a remote key fob, and forgot the key fob on the cars roof when driving off for a multi-hundred kms trip. It obviously got lost and when stopping the engine at some random town along the way, we couldn't start the car anymore. (Luckily we had the trunk open when realizing that.)
An elderly lady we met at the parking lot offered us, three random strangers in their 30s stay at her place for the night. Her nephew even drove to the camping area where we headed off and probably lost the key. It was heart-warming.
After returning home we sent her a huge Christmas packet with typical specialties from Austria. (Pumpkin seed oil and others. :-) )
In all seriousness, people probably do more favors for attractive strangers. And HN is probably populated with average-looking people, at best. In some ways, this means that the stories posted here will be of true altruism.
On the other hand, if you asked a bunch of great-looking people what strangers had done for them, you'd get a bunch of stories about people who were very kind (but perhaps not entirely altruistic in their intent).
Just now, I'm travelling through India, and today was particularily rough. (I'm trying to go from Delhi Airport to Agra). Multiple Ubers turned out bad (scams, no-show, or fucking with pickup point). I spent several hours in this limbo getting nowhere. I end up taking a train without ticket on advice of multiple people around me, since the counter refused to sell me one.
Turns out, wrong train, going slightly the wrong way. But a guy walks up to me in the train, asks me where I'm going, and starts to help me get to where I need to go. He arranged a bunk for me, talked to the conductor for me, bought(!) another train to Agra for me, called hostels in Agra, etc etc. I've had multiple such encounters here in India, of people going so far out of their way to help me here, something you would honestly never see in my country Germany. It's like a strange incongruence, with one fraction of the population hell-bent on fleecing you for all you've got, and another that will go way further out of their way for you than you could ever imagine.
If you find the sheer number of people too much, do visit either Himachal Pradesh or Uttarakhand! You will find THE kindest people there. Though be careful of leopard and bear attacks in Uttarakhand right now!!
Oh, I just came back from Shimla actually. I stayed in Narkanda for 2 days to do some hiking, and Shimla one day, though I didn't interact with many people there. My next stop is Kochi, hopefully things are also a little quieter there.
When I was very little, like 4 or 5, a new family moved in on the street. I was curious, so I took my little pedal-racecar down the street to where they were moving in to say hi and welcome to the neighborhood. The dad of the family caught me staring wide eyed at his enormous collection of CDs and vinyls, and asked me what my favourite song was. I thought for a while and then told him track 3 from Nevermind by Nirvana. He told me to listen to the local radio station the next day at 3pm.
Turns out he had his own show on the radio, and he played my song! Well, Nirvana's song, but the one I picked. He even dedicated it to me and everything! I thought I was bonafide rockstar for years after that!
I guess I should qualify the story by saying, he was a stranger at the time, but not for long. His son was 2 years younger than me and we became best friends, and he was like a second dad for me too. But that came later.
Bobo is not with us anymore, but here's to his memory.
1. on A9 near nurnberg we caught a ride with a musician from munich (he played trumpet and showed us his music when i asked if he had any recordings in the car). it was heavily raining and it was late in the night. as we were approaching munich, he got off the highway and i was worried how we were supposed to get back on the highway in the middle of a effing night, but he just drove home and we stayed overnight. we ate breakfast together with the whole family (wife, kids) and he drove us off to the nearest autobahn entry on his way to the conservatory (he used to teach there) - we were going south, to italy. that's first top of my head, surely there is more. good times. we connected, big time.
Took a few months off of work and decided to bicycle through the Philippines. One day was a very hard mountain stage, driving from Bacolod to San Carlos, on Negros island. Arrived at the top completely exhausted, layed on the roadside in an attempt to recover. Suddenly a car stopped and a young couple of locals handed me a sandwich and wished me luck. I'll never forget them
I had many cases of help from strangers in my life. One was not from a total stranger, but still.
I was couchsurfing with a bicycle, and was not able to find a place to stay on the last day. So, instead of trying I asked a guy where I stayed the first day if I can return. Not only he agreed, but also helped to get to the airport with my packaged bike.
Another case was when I stayed in Jordan, and the guy who I rented apt from helped us so much for free. He helped us to get to the dead sea (with two bikes, no less!), fought for the price with street traders so we could get an honest price and so on.
And the final and best story is about a people who found us trying to put up a tent during the huge storm in iceland.
They invited us to spend a night in their camping cabin and shared their dinner with us. This happened after we were going 12 hours through the storm with a heavily packed bikes. IT felt like an angels touch. I almost cried due to happiness (I hardly ever cried back then).
Oh, you jogged my memory. Coastie here again. Soon after moving to the west coast, 1980-ish, I lost my wallet around Easter, on or about University Ave in Palo Alto, and a kind stranger found it and dropped it off with police, IIRC. He wouldn't take any more than a lunch or dinner at the Good Earth. This was B.C. Before cellphones.
On the other side of the coin, I was leaving a thrift store in San Leandro and saw some black thing on the road. I was stopped at an intersection and picked it up. It was a wallet with $500 in it and a woman's out of state personal and business ID., but no local address or phone number. I took a real chance and left it with the thrift store staff, hoping they could find her. Perhaps she was just there? Well, they said later that they found her through her bank, and returned it to her. I forgot if it was before or after, but I did purchase two Klipsch Heresy Speakers there for $50 total.
I was sent to collections for a rabies vaccine (well the immunoglobulin post-exposure part was the real expensive one) that was supposed to be reimbursed under a pharma/CDC program. Something like $17k.
I begged the guy that helped me fill out the paperwork for that program to give me something proving the hospital was paid. He broke the law and gave me the whole month's reimbursed list of everyone in that program. Hospital made the situation go away in less than a day once they saw I had it.
I will never forget his name since he put his ass on the line doing that and I never met him in person, just a few phone calls.
When returning to Washington University in St. Louis, I was walking a few miles with some luggage. Someone offered to carry one piece with me to the dorm. It was only after reaching the dorm that I realized she was barefoot!
My rc drone lost signal and flew out of range several miles away. Being from a small town, the person who found it eventually found out it was mine, and he returned it.
I don't think so, but people are so distracted, by their phones, that they don't notice that other might need help.
There's also two or three generations of people now who are absolutely terrified of talking to others, so you have to exhibit so level of distress for them to act.
Generally though, I feel like people want to help strangers, and social media makes that easier to do. We have a local organisation that helps those less fortunate, and last year they wrote on Facebook a few days before Christmas that they had five familie (I think if was five), who hadn't been able to get help elsewhere and if people had food, or money they could spare. Took them just a few hours to ensure a nice Christmas for those families. Without social media, we wouldn't have known, and it basically only Facebook that can reach so many generous people in such a short time.
I ordered the wrong thing on doordash yesterday and the store manager called me to ask if i was sure i wanted a pizza with no toppings. good on her for not delivering me a plain crust nothing pizza. she even had it in the oven already just in case. s tier human being
I was in a city in a foreign country once and completely lost. A local showed me the way to my hotel and walked at least a mile with me. This was a long time ago but I still remember her kindness.
I went to Tokyo a couple of times for different reasons, and was frequently amazed by the people in the street or behind the counter in a restaurant, etc, who would stop and take the time to help me, often in perfect English, do whatever it was that I was failing with!
I am running through my memory bank, and can't really think of one outside friends and family.
OTOH, I seem to be "that stranger" whenever possible. And that's mighty satisfying. People I've studied under or assisted with computer support have a habit of getting Nobel Physics Prizes. I have aggressively looked for and found, owners of lost cell phones and ipods.
Sorry to disappoint!
BTW, a friend is an M.D. While I was visiting his home, his cat scratched me, and I asked if he had any betadine. He didn't. So, you never know. Having been in the Coast Guard "Semper Paratus" always ready, I tend to bring small tools and first aid with me when I drive, but the only application so far was someone whose battery died in the SFO cell phone lot around midnight, and I had the jumper cable handy. The more serious one was when I was coming home and saw a light flickering in the neighbor's detached garage. Well, he wasn't welding. It was an electrical fire, and I made sure they knew about it post haste (they were watching TV in the front room). And that's about it.
When I was about 3 years old, a man in a car tried to abduct me right in my front yard by offering me candy to lure me closer.
An old woman we did not know witnessed this from down the street, recognized what was off about the situation, and rushed over yelling, scaring off the man.
Not sure if I would be here today if not for her. My parents never were able to find out who she was.
Another one just came to me, as I witnessed it yesterday on the train. A homeless man was walking down the train aisle, shaking a handful of coins and asking people for change in a long drawn out plead.
Everyone stared deeper into their phones until he went away, but when he came back a woman with a child handed him some change and he walked on without thanking her.
The kid asked "why did you give him money mummy?" and her response was simply "you see homeless, you give money" and that was the end of it. I just liked the implicit matter-of-fact decency in which she lived her life.
I lost my phone while I was out once. A stranger found it and started calling people in the contacts with my last name (I don't have any lock method) figuring they'd know a secondary way to reach me. That worked and I got in touch with him, and then he came by and delivered it back to me at my house.
5th grade, my best friend at the time was in a basketball team, just a small town league for kids. I never really played basketball, so I was planning to watch the game then we'd hang out. It was the first game of the season and my friend was getting his uniform from a table when a dad running things asked me what team I was playing on and I said no, I'm just here to hang out with my friend.
He shook his head and said, "No, that won't do. You're on his team, too" and handed me a jersey. Then he went ahead and paid my registration fee.
More than the money, it was the proactive nature of it that struck me at the time. The thing is, if I had asked my parents they probably would have signed me up. But it was one of those things where it would have never crossed my mind to ask. I ws as one of those kids that needed a push every now and then and rarely got one.
I never got very good at basketball but I never missed a game and had a great time with my friend. So not a tragic or desperate story, but still meaningful to me all these years later.
There is a million ways where that interaction goes sideways and becomes a drama between the parents nowadays.
Eating at nice restaurant with my entire family. When we finished the meal the waiter came out with a dessert and said that someone across the restaurant paid for our entire meal. I was shocked, I looked around and I think I might know who it was, but they were already gone. That was probably a $150-$200 dollar check. I'm still shocked to this day.
I live in Minnesota and do not own a snowblower. Probably my mistake, but I always joke that I get most of my exercise in the winter. Snow is really heavy for those without context.
A couple years ago we had a particularly bad snowfall. The plow has a nasty hate filled habit of dumping all its snow in my driveway. I had a drift at the end of my driveway about 4 feet high and 6 feet deep. Literally up to my chest. I had spent a solid hour just chipping away at it trying to get my car out and had made very little progress.
Right as I was about to give up in frustration, a man in a bobcat drove by. Moments later he turned around, came back, and asked "would you like me to clear that for you?" I told him that would be amazing. Took him a couple minutes and then he waved and drove off before I got a chance to offer him any money or even thank him.
I think about this guy pretty often, it's absolutely the random act of kindness in my life I have appreciated most.
A recent lesser snowfall for context:
https://imgur.com/a/1un20s7
Plot twist: He just wanted an excuse to try out his new snowblower.
There’s more of this than you might expect. First time I got to turn on my new Toro I went the entire way around the block.
I wish I could see the photo but I live in the UK…
My best friend, his girlfriend, brother, sister and I piled into a minivan in July of 2018 and drove from Boston to SF. Best friend and I both took jobs there out of school and decided to make a trip of the life move.
We painted BOS > SF on the back window. At a gas station in Memphis a random guy walked up to us and said "Make sure you go to Graceland. Can't miss it."
We sort of smile and nod politely and then walk into the gas station to use the bathroom, reload on snacks etc.
10 mins later we come back outside and the same guy comes over "I bought you all tickets to Graceland, who can I text them to?"
Truly such a sick moment. Graceland was a highlight of the trip and to have someone just do such a random kind thing made it that much better. Long live Elvis, long live the King. Thanks again to whoever you are that did that. Respect.
Was he an older guy with a curl in his upper lip?
he was definitely alive
Was he a soulful bearded guy?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PgRafRp-P-o
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ac-00KY_XGM
I saw my mom do something as a child that really stuck with me. This was back in the 70s cause I’m old. It was summer in the Midwest we were in the car in a store parking lot gettin ready to leave. An African-American lady pulled into a spot beside our car. In front of her was a pickup truck with two men and a pregnant woman. They started accosting the lady telling her she had bumped their vehicle and now the pregnant woman was in pain. This was the 70s so everyone’s windows were down so we heard the whole thing. The gist was these people were clearly trying to extort money from this lady. My mom got out and dressed them down because she had been watching and the ladies car didn’t touch their truck. They sulked and drove away. The lady was very afraid and very grateful. This was a time and place where not a lot of African Americans lived. That really stuck with me over the years.
3-day bike trip, NYC to Provincetown. On day two, our group split up and I was riding with a close friend. 15 miles into the 100-mile day, we got our 3rd flat. We had only carried 2 spare tubes.
We had barely pulled our bikes onto the sidewalk when a woman in a sedan slowed down to ask if we needed help. We said yes and she quickly pulled over. We piled our bikes into her car, trunk open, and she drove us to the nearest bike shop.
Turns out her family member ran the shop.
Truly saved our day. We made it to Provincetown and 15 years later still remember her so fondly and are so thankful!
I missed last train due to delays and there was a group of in the same situation. One nice person offered me to that I can sleep on their couch. And they were so nice to give me a ride to the station the next day.
I was so angry at first when I found out that this was my last train and I missed it but it turned out to be great story I can tell :)
Thank you strangers, I'll repay it back to somebody in the future
My chain had slipped off the rear sprocket, wedged itself between the gear and the frame. I forgot my toolkit and I was unable to free it. I was miles out of town so a walk back was going to take hours. A guy on a motorcycle rode by, looked at me and turned around. He got off his bike, got his tools, and freed the chain in seconds. I was profoundly grateful. Years later, I happened across a cyclist in a similar situation. I helped him and I told him I was simply paying back the first guy who had helped me. It felt really good.
Was busking on Oxford with an accordion. An American tourist gave me a bottle of wine.
Less exotic than some stories here but I remember it 20 years later.
Stopped in the dark on a December night on the shoulder of an interstate junction to change a tire after I had a blowout while driving. Under normal circumstances, I probably could have handled it myself, but I was getting about four hours of sleep a night because of tinnitus.
I was very nervous when a random guy stopped. My initial thought was, "Am I about to be robbed?" But it turned out that he was just a local aerospace engineer, and it was his hobby to help stranded motorists.
We had driven to a small remote village on Vancouver Island BC, to catch an early morning ferry. We had reserved a room at the only motel in town. We got there around 9PM. The a*h** owner ignored the doorbell and did not let us in (we could see him moving around in his attached residence). We went to a restaurant that was just about closing, told our story, and asked the owners if there were any options. Their friend, who was hanging around there overheard us .. he invited us to come over to his house and spend the night. The next day he insisted on buying us a wonderful breakfast.
When we got back home after the long trip, we sent him a nice sweatshirt with "New Jersey" on it.
A stranger risked his life to save me from drowning in Costa Rica.
I love going out of my way to help people, but hate when people help me or give me gifts. I don’t know how to experience “pure” gratitude that isn’t overwhelmed by guilt.
I should probably talk to somebody about that…
My therapist told me you can't really give if you can't also receive. I'm in the same boat you are. Trying to get better at it.
Didn't expel me from university for an insensitive prank I accidentally sent to the administration instead of my friends. I discovered the university's email server was unsecured and thought it would be funny to send fake emergency alerts to my friends from the official university email. I mixed up the "from" and "to" fields though... oops.
Not a stranger but strangers I was returning home from an event early evening. Being absorbed in my thoughts. I got both my front tires free spinning without traction in a ditch.
Although this was in Nigeria, we have this certain camaraderie through hardship, it was still extremely surprising seeing a group of 6 men come out of nowhere, having nothing to do with each other aside being passerbys join hands, exerting sweaty effort to get my car out a ditch by 8pm.
Left me quite an impression
I high-centered my car on a drift coming out of the Taco Bell drive thru - not a minute passed before ten or so people appeared out of nowhere and pushed me over and out.
Literally, the moment before there hadn’t been anything around but me and that Taco Bell.
I like this. I hope this thread fills with many more comments.
I think it's important to remember especially in traffic and such that cars aren't cars, they are people. I have no idea the real ratios, but imagine 20% are genuinely good people, 60% are just going about their lives, and 20% are miserable for some reason and drive like miserable people. It's easy to think everyone else is an idiot and become aggressive, but remember it's a small percentage who actually agitate you.
Now to answer the question. I guess it's when I was a kid, I'd completely torn my ACL but they wouldn't operate until I was done growing. I don't know how old, 12 maybe? I was in Washington DC running across a busy street when my knee slid out of place and I fell in the road. A Mercedes stopped, purposely blocking both lanes of traffic, and a husky middle aged black lady in scrubs got out and dragged me out of the road onto the sidewalk. She asked if I was ok, and I was as it happened here and there, and off she went. It was such a kind gesture in a city that seemed so cold and always on the go.
I was at an antique shop in Alameda about to buy a pulp sci-fi book. It was just a couple of bucks, nothing expensive. But the card reader wasn't accepting my Apple Pay. Another guy shopping there offered to pay for me. I told him I could Venmo or PayPal him the money, but he wouldn't take it. It wasn't a big deal in terms of money, but he didn't have to do that
Some years ago, I left my wallet at home and had filled my car with petrol at the petrol station, and the lady behind me paid for it and refused to give me her details so I could return the money.
I was blown away and so grateful.
I have paid it forward many times over.
I had finished my hamburger, zoning out. I had my guitar with me, having had a belowpar band practice, while waiting for my therapist appointment. Life was heading downwards in a slow, but steady, fashion.
This wonderful woman came over and asked if I wanted a hug. It warmed me to my bones. She said that "people should do that more", or something along those lines, and disappeared.
I don't remember her face, I just remember the warm feeling in my chest.
It was snowing. I scraped the windshield of my car. When I was done, I turned the key - and the battery was dead. I shrugged, gathered my belongings and was about to go back into my apartment building. But a woman who has just arrived in her car came up to me. And she asked, “Is your car not starting? You can use mine if you like.” I had needed seen here before. I took it. I returned it with a full tank in the evening. I’ve since had two other random strangers lend me their car, both in Germany and in the US. It’s something I wouldn’t have believed people would do. And it’s something I wouldn’t have accepted out of fear. But I had learned: Being kind and accepting kindness are two sides of the same coin. The one cannot exists without the other.
I honestly would be scared shitless lending a stranger my car.
I wouldn't be comfortable borrowing someone's car, especially in the snow. If I were GP, I'd have driven it up next to my car, used the battery to jump mine, and thanked the stranger.
Me, Austrian and two Austrian friends were doing a road trip through western Canada. We had a rental car with a remote key fob, and forgot the key fob on the cars roof when driving off for a multi-hundred kms trip. It obviously got lost and when stopping the engine at some random town along the way, we couldn't start the car anymore. (Luckily we had the trunk open when realizing that.)
An elderly lady we met at the parking lot offered us, three random strangers in their 30s stay at her place for the night. Her nephew even drove to the camping area where we headed off and probably lost the key. It was heart-warming.
After returning home we sent her a huge Christmas packet with typical specialties from Austria. (Pumpkin seed oil and others. :-) )
I'll write her a letter this Christmas.
Someone held a door open for me so I had to pick up the pace.
I'm ugly so strangers aren't nice to me.
In all seriousness, people probably do more favors for attractive strangers. And HN is probably populated with average-looking people, at best. In some ways, this means that the stories posted here will be of true altruism.
On the other hand, if you asked a bunch of great-looking people what strangers had done for them, you'd get a bunch of stories about people who were very kind (but perhaps not entirely altruistic in their intent).
Just now, I'm travelling through India, and today was particularily rough. (I'm trying to go from Delhi Airport to Agra). Multiple Ubers turned out bad (scams, no-show, or fucking with pickup point). I spent several hours in this limbo getting nowhere. I end up taking a train without ticket on advice of multiple people around me, since the counter refused to sell me one.
Turns out, wrong train, going slightly the wrong way. But a guy walks up to me in the train, asks me where I'm going, and starts to help me get to where I need to go. He arranged a bunk for me, talked to the conductor for me, bought(!) another train to Agra for me, called hostels in Agra, etc etc. I've had multiple such encounters here in India, of people going so far out of their way to help me here, something you would honestly never see in my country Germany. It's like a strange incongruence, with one fraction of the population hell-bent on fleecing you for all you've got, and another that will go way further out of their way for you than you could ever imagine.
If you find the sheer number of people too much, do visit either Himachal Pradesh or Uttarakhand! You will find THE kindest people there. Though be careful of leopard and bear attacks in Uttarakhand right now!!
Oh, I just came back from Shimla actually. I stayed in Narkanda for 2 days to do some hiking, and Shimla one day, though I didn't interact with many people there. My next stop is Kochi, hopefully things are also a little quieter there.
When I was very little, like 4 or 5, a new family moved in on the street. I was curious, so I took my little pedal-racecar down the street to where they were moving in to say hi and welcome to the neighborhood. The dad of the family caught me staring wide eyed at his enormous collection of CDs and vinyls, and asked me what my favourite song was. I thought for a while and then told him track 3 from Nevermind by Nirvana. He told me to listen to the local radio station the next day at 3pm.
Turns out he had his own show on the radio, and he played my song! Well, Nirvana's song, but the one I picked. He even dedicated it to me and everything! I thought I was bonafide rockstar for years after that!
I guess I should qualify the story by saying, he was a stranger at the time, but not for long. His son was 2 years younger than me and we became best friends, and he was like a second dad for me too. But that came later.
Bobo is not with us anymore, but here's to his memory.
Warn me antipsychotics cause diabetes
They hired me. That was in 1996 and I still work for them today.
1. on A9 near nurnberg we caught a ride with a musician from munich (he played trumpet and showed us his music when i asked if he had any recordings in the car). it was heavily raining and it was late in the night. as we were approaching munich, he got off the highway and i was worried how we were supposed to get back on the highway in the middle of a effing night, but he just drove home and we stayed overnight. we ate breakfast together with the whole family (wife, kids) and he drove us off to the nearest autobahn entry on his way to the conservatory (he used to teach there) - we were going south, to italy. that's first top of my head, surely there is more. good times. we connected, big time.
Took a few months off of work and decided to bicycle through the Philippines. One day was a very hard mountain stage, driving from Bacolod to San Carlos, on Negros island. Arrived at the top completely exhausted, layed on the roadside in an attempt to recover. Suddenly a car stopped and a young couple of locals handed me a sandwich and wished me luck. I'll never forget them
They made some open source software for me ;^)
Kinda a similar story, I slipped off my bike at the end of a wet turn and scraped up my leg.
A woman passing by saw the whole thing, and said she lived nearby and would happily run me a bath.
I took her up on the offer, and, um, I was a few hours late to work that day :-)
Wow, "Dear Penthouse,"
I had many cases of help from strangers in my life. One was not from a total stranger, but still.
I was couchsurfing with a bicycle, and was not able to find a place to stay on the last day. So, instead of trying I asked a guy where I stayed the first day if I can return. Not only he agreed, but also helped to get to the airport with my packaged bike.
Another case was when I stayed in Jordan, and the guy who I rented apt from helped us so much for free. He helped us to get to the dead sea (with two bikes, no less!), fought for the price with street traders so we could get an honest price and so on.
And the final and best story is about a people who found us trying to put up a tent during the huge storm in iceland.
They invited us to spend a night in their camping cabin and shared their dinner with us. This happened after we were going 12 hours through the storm with a heavily packed bikes. IT felt like an angels touch. I almost cried due to happiness (I hardly ever cried back then).
Oh, you jogged my memory. Coastie here again. Soon after moving to the west coast, 1980-ish, I lost my wallet around Easter, on or about University Ave in Palo Alto, and a kind stranger found it and dropped it off with police, IIRC. He wouldn't take any more than a lunch or dinner at the Good Earth. This was B.C. Before cellphones.
On the other side of the coin, I was leaving a thrift store in San Leandro and saw some black thing on the road. I was stopped at an intersection and picked it up. It was a wallet with $500 in it and a woman's out of state personal and business ID., but no local address or phone number. I took a real chance and left it with the thrift store staff, hoping they could find her. Perhaps she was just there? Well, they said later that they found her through her bank, and returned it to her. I forgot if it was before or after, but I did purchase two Klipsch Heresy Speakers there for $50 total.
I was sent to collections for a rabies vaccine (well the immunoglobulin post-exposure part was the real expensive one) that was supposed to be reimbursed under a pharma/CDC program. Something like $17k.
I begged the guy that helped me fill out the paperwork for that program to give me something proving the hospital was paid. He broke the law and gave me the whole month's reimbursed list of everyone in that program. Hospital made the situation go away in less than a day once they saw I had it.
I will never forget his name since he put his ass on the line doing that and I never met him in person, just a few phone calls.
When returning to Washington University in St. Louis, I was walking a few miles with some luggage. Someone offered to carry one piece with me to the dorm. It was only after reaching the dorm that I realized she was barefoot!
My rc drone lost signal and flew out of range several miles away. Being from a small town, the person who found it eventually found out it was mine, and he returned it.
Did he find it with a helicopter?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ffEYqGGYXRk
I'm wondering if altruism is in decline, in this selfish age of social media.
I don't think so, but people are so distracted, by their phones, that they don't notice that other might need help.
There's also two or three generations of people now who are absolutely terrified of talking to others, so you have to exhibit so level of distress for them to act.
Generally though, I feel like people want to help strangers, and social media makes that easier to do. We have a local organisation that helps those less fortunate, and last year they wrote on Facebook a few days before Christmas that they had five familie (I think if was five), who hadn't been able to get help elsewhere and if people had food, or money they could spare. Took them just a few hours to ensure a nice Christmas for those families. Without social media, we wouldn't have known, and it basically only Facebook that can reach so many generous people in such a short time.
I ordered the wrong thing on doordash yesterday and the store manager called me to ask if i was sure i wanted a pizza with no toppings. good on her for not delivering me a plain crust nothing pizza. she even had it in the oven already just in case. s tier human being
I was in a city in a foreign country once and completely lost. A local showed me the way to my hotel and walked at least a mile with me. This was a long time ago but I still remember her kindness.
I went to Tokyo a couple of times for different reasons, and was frequently amazed by the people in the street or behind the counter in a restaurant, etc, who would stop and take the time to help me, often in perfect English, do whatever it was that I was failing with!
Yes, this happened to me at the time. Most people had bad English and I had bad Japanese when I went but some of them were very kind.
I am running through my memory bank, and can't really think of one outside friends and family.
OTOH, I seem to be "that stranger" whenever possible. And that's mighty satisfying. People I've studied under or assisted with computer support have a habit of getting Nobel Physics Prizes. I have aggressively looked for and found, owners of lost cell phones and ipods.
Sorry to disappoint!
BTW, a friend is an M.D. While I was visiting his home, his cat scratched me, and I asked if he had any betadine. He didn't. So, you never know. Having been in the Coast Guard "Semper Paratus" always ready, I tend to bring small tools and first aid with me when I drive, but the only application so far was someone whose battery died in the SFO cell phone lot around midnight, and I had the jumper cable handy. The more serious one was when I was coming home and saw a light flickering in the neighbor's detached garage. Well, he wasn't welding. It was an electrical fire, and I made sure they knew about it post haste (they were watching TV in the front room). And that's about it.
I can't really think of anything unfortunately, except courtesy stuff like holding a door. People don't really interact with strangers where I live.
where do you live?
When I was about 3 years old, a man in a car tried to abduct me right in my front yard by offering me candy to lure me closer. An old woman we did not know witnessed this from down the street, recognized what was off about the situation, and rushed over yelling, scaring off the man. Not sure if I would be here today if not for her. My parents never were able to find out who she was.
Another one just came to me, as I witnessed it yesterday on the train. A homeless man was walking down the train aisle, shaking a handful of coins and asking people for change in a long drawn out plead.
Everyone stared deeper into their phones until he went away, but when he came back a woman with a child handed him some change and he walked on without thanking her.
The kid asked "why did you give him money mummy?" and her response was simply "you see homeless, you give money" and that was the end of it. I just liked the implicit matter-of-fact decency in which she lived her life.
I lost my phone while I was out once. A stranger found it and started calling people in the contacts with my last name (I don't have any lock method) figuring they'd know a secondary way to reach me. That worked and I got in touch with him, and then he came by and delivered it back to me at my house.
Someone gave me the quarter I needed to unlock an Aldis Grocery Cart
Invited me to his house to cut and shorten some shelves for me, after the hardware store refused because I hadn’t bought them there.
Sent me 260 dollars.
thats a hard one, but all in all sexual favors has to top the list