I would say the culture one exists in, has a greater impact on what the norm is for time outside of work. I'd also note one can be surrounded by people but still unable to form any deeper friendship than what exists with the average work associate, so for some guys it should be no surprise their best friend ever is their own spouse.
>Julie Menanno, a couples therapist and attachment-theory expert who is the author of the best seller Secure Love: Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime, thinks the larger issue is that men, married or not, don’t even process the fact that they crave connection. “They’re so disconnected from their emotional-relationship needs that they don’t realize, ‘Hey, I feel lonely.’”
Maybe cultural differences is why I think that has to be the oddest thing to hear a relationship specialist claim.
A lot of married guys I've known (I am myself perpetually single, though seem to be some sort of sounding board for whatever reason) are generally acutely aware if their wife or someone they consider a close friend has withdrawn without any apparent good reasons [1] and are frustrated they not able to connect with their spouse or friend as they once did.
Single guys who've missed finding their sweethearts by their early mid 20s, until a time they still feel not too old to consider the possibility of a wife and perhaps children are generally not about to admit how lonely they feel or immerse themselves in that loneliness - they're more likely to be too busy to notice, life just happens as they work, look for work and spend their moments away from work, with friends and family, fleeting relationships, and casual hookups, while perhaps dwelling on reasons, fate or providence, a need to have a better job, etc, for why they can't seem to find that special someone.
[1] extra commitments due to more work, community involvement, club, P&C (school) association or charity events ...
I’ve seen and heard this common misconception from women for many years now. It’s not unusual for men to regress socially as they find a mate and start a new family. I personally have done that and prefer time with my family over socializing with friends. And my friends seem to do the same.
But for women, this doesn’t seem to happen as much. Pity the poor men being dragged to social functions against their will. I literally have a T-shirt that states ‘Sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to come’.
Saying your husband has no friends is incorrect. I’m sure he has plenty of friends, he just doesn’t spend much or any time with them. That’ll change when the divorce finalizes.
I would say the culture one exists in, has a greater impact on what the norm is for time outside of work. I'd also note one can be surrounded by people but still unable to form any deeper friendship than what exists with the average work associate, so for some guys it should be no surprise their best friend ever is their own spouse.
>Julie Menanno, a couples therapist and attachment-theory expert who is the author of the best seller Secure Love: Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime, thinks the larger issue is that men, married or not, don’t even process the fact that they crave connection. “They’re so disconnected from their emotional-relationship needs that they don’t realize, ‘Hey, I feel lonely.’”
Maybe cultural differences is why I think that has to be the oddest thing to hear a relationship specialist claim.
A lot of married guys I've known (I am myself perpetually single, though seem to be some sort of sounding board for whatever reason) are generally acutely aware if their wife or someone they consider a close friend has withdrawn without any apparent good reasons [1] and are frustrated they not able to connect with their spouse or friend as they once did.
Single guys who've missed finding their sweethearts by their early mid 20s, until a time they still feel not too old to consider the possibility of a wife and perhaps children are generally not about to admit how lonely they feel or immerse themselves in that loneliness - they're more likely to be too busy to notice, life just happens as they work, look for work and spend their moments away from work, with friends and family, fleeting relationships, and casual hookups, while perhaps dwelling on reasons, fate or providence, a need to have a better job, etc, for why they can't seem to find that special someone.
[1] extra commitments due to more work, community involvement, club, P&C (school) association or charity events ...
I’ve seen and heard this common misconception from women for many years now. It’s not unusual for men to regress socially as they find a mate and start a new family. I personally have done that and prefer time with my family over socializing with friends. And my friends seem to do the same.
But for women, this doesn’t seem to happen as much. Pity the poor men being dragged to social functions against their will. I literally have a T-shirt that states ‘Sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to come’.
Saying your husband has no friends is incorrect. I’m sure he has plenty of friends, he just doesn’t spend much or any time with them. That’ll change when the divorce finalizes.
I believe the real problem is people dont have time.
The more time people have the more time they have for friends and family and enjoying life.
https://archive.ph/eMe1U